Madness of an Affair
by Renewed
Summary: Allen, in a relationship that was killing him slowly with his partner as a Bookman,who can never belong totally to him.Till he met Kanda, a man saying that he wants him, after he breaks him slowly into a mess he can never clean up.Full Summary Inside.
1. Beginning

Author's Note: Hey I'm back. This is the holidays and I plan to keep on writing. I stopped for a while due to a crazy school semester. But it's holidays again so I'll definitely plan to get the now 3 fictions up and running or better yet finish them. Please enjoy this new story and I play with insanity. Thanks.

Summary: Allen, in a relationship that was killing him slowly with his partner as a Bookman, who can never belong totally to him. Till he met Kanda, a man saying that he wants him, after he breaks him slowly into a mess he can never clean up. Will Allen resist or break under everything? Lavi/Allen/Kanda Lavi/Lenalee

Chapter 1: Beginning

Loud footsteps echoed the dark hallways as a young red haired man walked hurriedly down it. He smoothly slid past people as he gripped tightly on the bouquet of beautiful white lilies. On his handsome face was an uneasy smile which had excitement and anxiety written all over it.

He widened his eyes in recognition before waving his free hand wildly in the air while continuing to walk to the group of equally(or more) anxious people.

It was the day that he had been waiting for eight months.

"How's he doing?" the red haired youngster asked as the group of four people walked nearer to him.

"He's doing just fine from what had heard so far. He took the Forbidden in better than we expected." A man with white hair at the front while black at the back replied with a smile as he glanced back at the room where the person they were talking about was.

"He'll be just fine, Lavi. He's a strong one." A woman in her mid-twenties nodded with an uneasy smile. Her dark eye bags made her seem even more worried than how she usually was.

"Miranda-san, you should take a seat. You look like you're about to collapsed!" a young Chinese man said as he led the woman to a nearby seat. The red haired stared after the Chinese man blankly before raising an eyebrow at the last person of the group. He was a man in his eighties whose eyes still remained clear and focus.

"We needed someone to keep Arystar and Miranda calm. I'm too old to do it." The old man said monotone while Lavi resisted the urge to roll his eyes in front of his Master. Lavi knew better than that. After all, he wasn't to get involve in this. However, nothing got him more worked up then _him_.

"You are aware," Lavi turned back to his master who stared at him in the eyes. "He isn't going to remember anyone when you enter in. When someone accepts the Forbidden, they give up their former Self. You will just be a stranger to him, just like the rest of us."

Lavi looked at his master for a while before turning back to the door. A dead and uneasy silence fell onto them. The master closed his eyes in defeat. This apprentice of his, was the most rebellious soon to be Bookman in history of Bookmen. Not only did he break a rule, he had even taken in a Precious.

"A Bookman with a Precious will have no happy ending, Lavi. Even 'Lavi' isn't your real name which you have thrown long ago. You would be making he live a life filled with lies and pain. Saying this now may already be too late, but at least you still can pass your License of this Precious to another. You do want him to be happy, right?" the old man continued before he stopped, his face not changing or showing any expression as the sharp tip of a hammer like weapon appeared a millimeter away from his throat. The one named Lavi, holding it as he continued to stare at the door.

"I know what I did. I know what awaits me. I know what awaits him. Did you think I didn't consider them all before making him my Precious? Did you think I myself didn't give him a choice whether he wanted to be what he is now? Don't mock me." Lavi glared at his master, suppressed anger reflecting in those strong emerald eyes.

The door of the room the group was waiting outside of opened, causing everybody to turn and look at the one whom they were waiting for. A boy no older than fifteen walked out, head bandaged up and bowed. He had a white gown on which was tainted with blood and water marks which the others suspected were tears. Despite his appearance, the group, led by Lavi, ran over to him.

Lavi held the younger boy tightly before kissing his bandaged head oh so gently. The boy immediately clenched onto him. Unable to take it anymore, Lavi quickly stood back and unwrapped the bandages. It slowly fell onto the ground softly. The others gasp at the changed features of the boy while Lavi remained indifferent; smiling lovingly as he caressed the lovely face he loved so dearly.

The honey brown hair had turned silvery white while a weird lightning like scar with a pentacle on the top was placed on his left eye area. As the younger boy opened his eyes slowly, the eyes Lavi remembered as brownish gold had turned into bluish silver. From afar, if the boy remained still, many would have mistaken him for a doll.

The doll like boy blinked several times before looking around. Lavi could tell that he had no idea where he was due to the confusion written in those beautiful eyes. Lavi patiently waited for the boy's eyes to fall onto him. Lavi blinked when tears fell from those eyes he adored so much and the boy hugged him tighter than before.

"……vi…" The red haired youngster widened his eyes in shocked before he quickly pushed the boy away from him, only to have the boy struggle to get as close to his chest as possible. Did he just hear the boy call his name?

"Surprised?" Lavi's head snapped up to the second newcomer, along with the others. The man was a tall guy with flaming long red hair and a goatee. He leaned against the door as he lit a cigarette. He breathed in through the cigarette before releasing a puff.

"He can remember?" Lavi whispered in shock as he held onto Allen tighter. Others stared in astonishment when the smoking man nodded.

"An Exceptionist is made when people do not follow the correct order of making a Precious." The smoking man explained. His eyes slowly moved to stare down at the Exceptionist who was holding onto the red haired youngster.

"Precious are humans who were made into life partners of beings that can live up to a thousand years, such as us, Methuselahs. The humans would be able to live as long as their Bonders and will only die when the Bonder dies.

You, boy, are the first out of the Bookman clan to make a Precious, a drifter that is like the presence of the wind, with no attachment. If you were to take in a lover, it would be wise to have made him or her a Precious, who would stay loyal to you no matter how many times you will hurt them due to your job. His past would be erased and his everything would be link to you.

At least, that was the plan……" The man trailed off as he took small steps to where Lavi was, before bending in front of the boys, looking the red haired youngster in the eye.

"He's been tainted, wasn't he?" The man whispered into Lavi's ears, leaving the others wondering what he was saying while the Exceptionist tensed at the words. Lavi remained indifferent. He glared at the man before standing up, with the younger boy in his arms.

"Other than the fact he can remember his past, there is nothing else out of the ordinary, right? If that's so, I'll be taking my leave." Lavi coldly said before he walked away from the group and the man, as he carried his Precious away. The flaming red haired man stared after him while the rest of the group chased after him.

"An Exceptionist and a Bookman, huh?" The man took a long drag from his cigarette. He looked up at the ceiling and breathed out.

"Those two might be destined to be the next Romeo and Juliet."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Ten years passed since that day he decided to give up everything for this Methuselah. Allen couldn't help but recall as he spread a little butter on a slice of bread and placed it into the toaster with an already done one. He then went to make some scrambled eggs and sausages. He was in fact, trying to keep himself busy and distracted from what was happening upstairs in a certain bed room where a Methuselah was.

With a certain client.

Allen squeezed his eyes tightly shut as he hugged himself. Many questions always filled his mind at this time. Why? Why did he still have memories intact? Why couldn't he be like a normal Precious who would feel nothing of betrayal and hurt?

He already knew that Lavi was a Bookman and had no choice but to do this as it was his job but it still hurt so much to see him with another. Even if there was no love in the act or anything, there were times Allen felt the urge to scream so badly. But he was not going to do that, he made his choice and this was what he was going to live with, as long as the other person still cared for him.

Footsteps were heard coming down the stairs snapped Allen out of his train of thoughts, making him quickly get ready the breakfast for the two newcomers in the room. In a matter of seconds, the red haired Bookman whose looks remained unchanged since the day Allen met him walked entered the room, a woman clinging onto him as they sat down at the kitchen table.

Allen tried to remain indifferent as the woman whined and giggled like an airhead next to Lavi while he placed the food on the table for them. Allen's eyes threaten to twitch as the girl hugged Lavi's arm ever so close to her chest that her breast were pressed so closely against his arm. Really, have the girls in this generation degraded themselves till they were like sluts? Allen couldn't help but wonder.

Allen then sat down at the kitchen counter, eating only cereal and milk as he started to read his World History book. He had made it a point to sit away from Lavi when a client was there. He would feel extremely awkward and appalled when people like the girl that was currently at the table with the Methuselah is flirting right in front of his eyes.

"Lavi, did you know? The cheerleading squad is having a practice for your big game tomorrow night? Would you like to come to see? We did a special something for you. Especially you." The girl said as she leaned closer to the red haired youngster's, description based on his looks, ear with a seductive smile. Allen lifted the book off the table to have it cover his face so as not the show his out of control twitching eyebrow.

"Haha. I'll like to make it but I made plans to help Allen with something." Allen heard the Methuselah reply, feeling his emerald eyes on him as he continued to hide his face behind the big thick book.

"Ha? If this is about the class duty thing that the teacher just started, I'll get my friend to help take over your place. I'm sure Allen doesn't mind. Right?" the girl said with a tone filled with authority to Allen who had finished his cereal and who going towards the sink to clean up.

"Do what you like." Allen said without turning back, washing the bowl and spoon quickly. Allen could feel Lavi's eyes still on him as he washed, as if hoping Allen would look back at him. "As long as I'm not the only one doing it, it's fine by me."

"Then it's settled!" The girl happily exclaimed with a clap. She stood up and reached into her bag to pull out a small makeup kit. "Could I use the bathroom for a moment? I need to freshen up." She said before kissing Lavi's cheek and rushing off before Lavi could even give her permission. When both heard the bathroom door closed shut, Lavi sighed, causing Allen to turn.

"Lavi, it's okay. I mean it's the job right?" Allen reassured him as he walked over to Lavi, picking up his bag on the way. Lavi frowned deeply.

"Allen, we haven't been together for one moment for the past year. I would really like to spend some time alone with you even if it means cleaning up a classroom or two." Lavi pouted sadly as he munched on his sausage like a child being told he couldn't have dessert. "I've missed you." Allen's eyes softened when Lavi's free hand took his and gave it a squeeze. Allen squeezed his back in response.

"I got to get going. Kanda's going have my head if I don't go early for class duty." Allen whispered lovingly to his Bonder and was about to leave when Lavi, whose hand is still holding onto Allen's, pulled the younger onto his lap. Allen gasped in surprise and before he knew it, he was being fiercely attacked by the lips. As quickly as it came, Lavi pulled back, leaving both boys panting.

"Fine, I'll wait for you after Student Council meeting." Allen pouted, leaving a very happy Lavi who cheered and cuddled Allen closer to him. "Now let go or your client is going to have a good gossip to spread in school."

"Hell, she wouldn't. Cause that'll mean she was a bad laid that pushed me into becoming gay." Lavi said happily with a smirk and a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Allen raised an eyebrow when he noticed Lavi kept rubbing his ear and gave an evil smile.

"Screamer?"

"The girl just thinks that men enjoy getting our ear drums tortured." Lavi whined childishly as Allen patted his head in sympathy and kissed his ears better. "Thank god the file on her is going to be over soon. I swear I've been hearing ringing sounds since the assignment was given to me."

"Bear with it ok. Put the dishes at the sink, I'll clear them when I get back." Allen pecked Lavi's cheek before standing up, to only still feel Lavi's hand holding him in place. "Lavi, if we remain like this, the results will be quite disastrous." Allen whispered with urgency in his voice but he stopped when Lavi's eyes reflected something that he would only show when Allen was around.

"You still love me right?" Lavi whispered, like a child begging to be loved as he encircled his arms around Allen's middle as he looked up at the Exceptionist. Allen looked down at the child like Bookman and remained silent. "A Bookman has to do everything in his power to get the records. From being as low life as a prostitute to being as pathetic as a person who has to eat his own shit, I will not being able to belong to anyone or anything."

"Well, it's been ten years and I'm still here, aren't I?" Allen smiled down at the Bookman as he kissed the top of his head. "If I have stopped loving you, I would have left, destroying the License you received for having a Precious like me. Lavi, I knew what I was getting into before I became your Precious. As long as you still love me, as long as you still need me, I'll be here for you, till the day you decide to leave me. That's why, don't need to ask, no need to feel insecure, just concentrate on your job with ease that I'll be waiting for you at the end." Allen murmured into Lavi's ear as he stroked Lavi's head comfortingly before he moved away from the Bookman. "I'm going off now. See you later."

Lavi managed out a small smile to return Allen's comforting one as the white haired Precious rushed out, obviously late for morning class duty. When the door slammed shut, Lavi's smile immediately vanished. When was the last time that they actually sat down together at the same table with no one around? Lavi pursed his lips and closed his eyes as the feelings that he had bottled up threatened to spill out.

Tens years, ten years since they made their bond official. During these ten years, assignments were constantly given to him ever since he officially became a Bookman. He had to entertain and sleep with so many of the people he was assigned to. Lavi always in his mind as he bedded them asked so many questions.

Why isn't her hair silvery white?

Why is his voice so low?

Why isn't this man's hand deformed?

After these sessions, Allen would be sitting outside patiently, waiting with a towel and a set of new clothes for both Lavi and the client. Allen's smile would still be there but there would be a slight shaking at the sides. Allen would accompany Lavi as he bathed, Lavi in the tub while Allen sat on a stool helping him get cleaned. If it weren't for knowing Allen was so long, Lavi wouldn't have notice Allen gripping he sponge more tightly then necessary, he wouldn't have noticed Allen's hand having the slight shaking as he helping him get clean, wouldn't have sensed Allen's tears threatening flow out as he patiently sat next to him, washing the soiled body of his.

Allen probably didn't know of this, but Lavi had caught him several times crying at a corner when Allen thought nobody was around. Lavi still remembered the shoulders that shook slightly as Allen tried to get them to stop moving, the harsh breathing and the soft sobs that wrecked through the Precious's body. But despite it all, the Precious still waited up for him and welcomed him back with open arms, with a smile that made everything seemed as if it was going to be alright.

Lavi was contented that Allen was always there. Lavi was grateful that Allen, no matter how soiled and dirty he was still held him so lovingly. Lavi was unbelievably fortunate that Allen was able to love someone who could never be able to belong to him.

Lavi was afraid that one day Allen would finally break and he wouldn't be able to be there to hold Lavi anymore.

"Lavi, sorry for making you wait." The unwanted girl cheerily chirped as she reentered the room and sat next to him.

_That's not your seat, get off it._

"We're finally alone." The girl grinned mischieviously as she hugged Lavi's arm, pressing her soft breast against his arm.

_Get off, get away, and don't press those near me._

"I was really waiting for Allen to get out. He's a nice guy and all but I just wanted us to have some private time and all, I'll pay him back later." She whispered in a low tone as she pressed her lips against Lavi's, which Lavi forced himself to return.

Lavi was afraid.

That one day, Allen would walk out the door and never come back to hold him again.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Allen looked out of the classroom window as he wiped the windows clean. The people in charge of duty in the morning were mostly jocks who just dumped the work on him and were out playing before lesson started. Allen got used to the trend; after all, six years pretending to be a high school kid in different schools tends to make you get the message. Cleaning wasn't a foreign thing to him; it had become his profession if he were to describe it.

Footsteps behind him made him turn his head as one of the students who still cared for the rules walked in, hair slightly messy while eyes shone with irritancy walked towards him with a bucket of clean water. Allen just closed his eyes at the boy and turned back to his job.

"The idiot class inspector wants me to clean the curtains." The new comer grumbled as he unhooked the curtains angrily. "He said you'll rip it if you did it yourself." He scowled as he threw the dusty grey curtains into the water.

"Yeah, sorry." Allen managed out an awkward smile as he continued to clean the windows. "Me and fabrics don't match well."

_The ripping of the bed sheets off the bed sounded out loudly as mismatched hands pulled and yanked. The owner gritted his teeth as he pulled on them like his life depended on it. When the sheets were finally off, his hands shook madly as he looked at the ripped up sheets and then to the naked king sized mattress. He scowled deeply._

"_It's still dirty."_

"Oi!! What are you looking at?" Allen jumped when the newcomer were standing next to him. Allen stuck his tongue out at the taller male as he walked away from the window.

"Nothing that concern you, Kanda." Allen shot back at the boy named Kanda as he rinsed the cloth in the bucket of the water. "Can't a guy daze out once in a while? Oh wait, your head's so empty that it's already in a daze itself." Allen muttered, only to get a hand fisting up his front and being pressed against the window he had just cleaned.

"I dare you to say that again, you little moyashi." Kanda spit the words out with acid covering each word. Allen was about to say something when he was blinded by something shiny.

"What the-?!" Allen exclaimed before he was dropped to the floor like a bag of potatoes. When Allen could finally focus his eyes, he saw Kanda stuffing something into his pocket hastily. "What are you hiding?"

_Lips moved against each other as a couple laid on the bed as hands roamed each other's bodies. Gasps and moans as the moonlight shone, trying to get pass the translucent curtains to the couple's body. When the two finally distanced away for a little while, the bottom one's hand touched the other's cheek and stroked it lightly._

"_This isn't going to work out, is it?" _

"None of your business." Kanda snapped at Allen before roughly grabbing the bucket of dirty water and curtains and stormed out of the room, causing water to spill onto the floor, leaving Allen with more work to do.

"Pffft. Girly boy who PMSes every day." Allen grumbled as he threw a rag on the floor to soak up one of the puddle on the floor.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"And that concludes the meeting." Lavi ended the Student Council meeting with a sigh of relief as the other students stood up and gathered the paperwork which was going to be dumped somewhere unless really needed as they thanked each other for working hard. Allen remained seated as he looked out of the window. His expression was blank while his eyes reflected the blue sky with the white puffy clouds around.

Lavi slowly shut the door and turned the lock as he turned, leaning against the door staring at the Precious. Staring at Allen like this always placed him in a dream state. It was enlightening, it was beautiful. Like a painting, Allen was beautiful to see as he watches the sky above, like expecting something to come.

_A red haired youngster walked in a bookstore as he shrugged his coat off. He nodded politely with a smile on his face to the owner before walking around, searching for something. He walked slowly and quietly to through the rows of dusty shelves, deeper and deeper, till he reached an area not many people know of and it was like a world where dust bunnies roam. He crouched down behind a shelf and carefully removed a book. He stared through the empty space where the book was and smiled. _

_There sat a boy no older than fourteen looking out of the window with a book lying on his chest. He sat there quietly, blank expression just looking up into the beautiful blue sky. The red youngster only wished to add a pair of white wings on the boy's back to complete the beautiful picture._

Allen gasped lightly when two familiar yet foreign arms came around him and embraced him. Allen just leaned back into the embrace and turned to meet emerald green ones. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment before Lavi broke the eye contact they had and nuzzled Allen's neck, while Allen kissed the top of his head.

Suddenly a scent crept itself into Allen's nostrils. His eyes widened a little as harsh reality hit him hard. The client's scent, though faint, was still on Lavi. Allen laughed weakly mentally as his hands fell slowly from Lavi's head.

"That girl's waiting," Allen murmured into Lavi's hair as he felt Lavi lift him up and settled him onto his lap. Lavi cuddled Allen closely to his chest causing Allen to sigh.

"I don't care."

"Your assignment?"

"Allen, it's been a year since we have had any quality time, may I remind you. I doubt you can even fit me in anymore!!!" Lavi whined loudly before coughing after Allen smacked his tummy hard.

"Yeah, I'm horny and whatever but you got to finish your assignment before you can do anything else." Allen flicked Lavi's forehead, earning a whimper from the Bookman. Allen couldn't help but chuckle at him while Lavi continued to hug him like a teddy bear. "Oh my gosh, you're like a little kid for someone who just passed one hundred and eighty. Hurry up and get your assignment done so I can get some."

"But I want my milk!!!!" Lavi whined again but dodged the punch that was supposed to land on his left eye. A sudden knock on the door shook the couple out of their lovey dovey. However, before Lavi went to the door, he pulled Allen in for one passionate kiss, leaving the boy breathless. "I'll definitely finish it and getting some with you tonight. So please wait up."

Lavi smirked at the flushed red lover of his before he unlocked the door, revealing Kanda, all pissed off behind the pile of paperwork he was carrying.

"Whoa!! Yuu, need help there?" Lavi cheerfully asked as Kanda quickly walked into the room and dumped the pile onto the table.

"Yeah. That crazy cheerleader you're dating is going about the hall looking for you. Please, get her to stop screaming, it'll do us a hell load of good." Kanda grumbled out angrily as he sat on one of the chair to rest. Lavi blinked before rushing out, slamming the door shut due to his rush.

A hand went up and twisted the lock shut for the second time that day. The owner continued to stare at the door before turning around to face Kanda who was looking back at him.

"I'm going to go insane soon." Allen whispered as he walked towards Kanda and leaned against the table.

"That's what I'm here for." Kanda muttered softly as he place his index finger at the bottom of the pile. "You're like this pile of paper. Slowly piling up so high that its getting dangerous. For me," Kanda applied pressure to the pile, causing the paper to slip and scatter about as the fall. "I'm waiting to collect up all the pieces you'll become. Little by little, slowly and carefully."

"Hoping to see me in a mess. You're cruel." Allen scowled at Kanda who smirked back at him.

"But you liked it, didn't you?" Kanda chuckled darkly as he trapped Allen slowly and whispered to his ear. "After all, we're the ones who started it together."

"_Please make a mess out of me." A whisper so desperate the Asian man chuckled and complied. "Make me burn. Kill me please." _

"Messing with my head, mocking me then taking advantage of me. What do you want from me?" Allen spat at Kanda who suddenly slammed Allen's head on the table, hard. Allen shut his eyes due to the pain and impact of the wood against his face. When he opened his eyes, he saw a shiny razor knife right in front of his eyes.

"I want to see you, mind broken and shaking, being molded into something of mine." Kanda said dangerously low as the knife drew closer towards Allen's eyes.

_A soiled up white haired teen, laid on the bed with blanket clenched closely to his chest continued to look away from the Asian as he was held from behind. The Asian chuckled a little before he whispered in Allen's ear._

"_Be mine."_

Author's Note: I decided to play and explore a little bit of insanity. I hope you like it so far. I'll continue with the other fictions as well. Read and review please.


	2. Starting

Author's Note: Second chapter. Finally.

Chapter 2: Starting

Allen walked out of the room, crumpled shirt and messed up hair. He silently shut the door to the room where Kanda had his back turned towards his as he filed the paperwork. It was if nothing had happened. Allen clenched his stomach in disgust as he slowly walked down the empty hall. The school building was usually empty around this time, since it was when after school activities took place.

Allen's eyes twitched when the disgust in his stomach seemed to spread itself apart and the feeling of ants crawling around his body made him start to claw at his skin. Allen looked at his arm in panic. There was nothing there, absolutely normal. What did Kanda do to him? He didn't do anything inappropriate to Allen unless Allen blackout of ten minutes of the time he was with the long haired teenager. Allen's fingers continued to scratch and claw, as if Allen had totally lost all control of his hand.

"Stop it……" Allen whispered to himself as his hands continued its actions, excruciating pain from his arm making him want to scream out but if he did, Kanda would walk out with those mocking eyes of his.

_The knife traveled about the smaller male's body as the taller male smirked down at him. Allen tried his best not to move. The knife tilted a little, dangerously sliding against Allen's creamy smooth skin. The going to cut, the going to hurt and the going to bleed made Allen pursed his lip before gasping in shock when Kanda turned him around and swung the razor back before it plunged down……_

Allen was now running down the hallway as fast as he could. His footsteps echoed the empty space as he kept looking back at the room he had exited not long ago. It looked harmless, after all, no out of the ordinary stuff was around the door. It was a regular plain white door. Allen covered his mouth as he ran and ran. He felt so disgusted, he felt so violated; he wanted to throw himself into the nearest ocean to wash off all the filth he felt his body was carrying.

_Kanda's eyes softened a little and he wrapped his arms around the smaller male, bringing him closer so that the boy would have a more comfortable position to finish what he had started. The taller male didn't blink as the smaller one pressed his lips against his, holding onto him so tightly. Kanda just didn't want to think that what the smaller was doing was a dream. He slowly released his grip on the razor which had stabbed a metal tag around the smaller male's wrist. _

Allen then slowed to a stop. His head remained bowed as he heard the screams and cheers coming from the field nearby. He turned his head and looked at his reflection that was faintly displayed on the window. It was faint but it was there, a stray tear had rolled down Allen's cheek. Not for himself, not for his betrayal towards Lavi, but for Kanda.

_Lips parted one another and Allen looked up, his eyes softened before he kissed Kanda's tears away. He allowed Kanda to hug him tighter as the taller man buried his face into Allen's shoulder._

"_We're the same, no matter how you see it, Allen, two people who are in pain."_

Allen's hand unconsciously traveled to his stomach and rubbed it gently. In pain? Yes, the other was right. He knew Kanda's condition before this whole thing started. Both needed something to escape reality for a moment. Both needed something that would allow them to throw away all responsibility.

Both needed a shoulder to place their heads on and cry like how children do when they were bullied and seeking comfort with their parents.

Kanda's head shot up when he heard the door that was closed from before open and turned around to see Allen, looking so lost that he could have been mistaken for a mere child. Kanda's scowl turned to a slight frown when Allen pulled a chair next to Kanda and sat down before resting his head in his folded arms on the table.

Kanda blinked at the action for a moment before he made a sign of acknowledgement and returned to his papers. The silence wasn't disturbing; it provided comfort unexpectedly for both males as Allen continued to remain silent within his arms while Kanda signed the useless forms. An hour passed, two hours passed and finally the sun outside was setting when Kanda finally done with the forms, having them filed neatly and placed in the shelves with a relieved sigh. He stood there, staring into the space between the files.

"Thank you." Kanda whispered to Allen softly as he remained at the same spot. It was barely audible but still Allen could hear him. Of course he could, they are the same type after all.

Kanda turned his head to look out of the window. He could see a clear view of the basketball court. The cheerleaders cheering, the fans screaming and shouting while the players ran about the court, Kanda's eyes drifted to a certain red headed counselor, who was playing with a huge competitive smirk on his face as he ran and scored a hoop. The crowd went wild and the cheerleaders seemed to be controlling themselves from jumping on the star.

"Isn't it sad? Without you, he still seemed to be having the time of his life down there." Kanda muttered emotionlessly as he continued to look on, hands in his pockets. The slight shuffling of clothes could be heard as he felt Allen tensed at his words. Unconsciously, Kanda smirked a little.

"It must be a pain. Your appearance makes you stand out and people think weird people are freaks at first sight. Without even knowing you, cast you aside as an outcast. Your qualities are so much better then those they are cheering for but yet you're treated like the lowest scam rat there is. You can't run to him too. His reputation might get dirtied by you if you go near him."

"You must have asked yourself so many times why you are still here even when he is grinning and smirking without a care in the world without you. Have you ever asked yourself, maybe Lavi is not acting but really having a good time? Maybe its your mind that is telling you to stay?" Kanda closed his eyes and smirked wider when he felt a pair of hands wrapped around his neck from behind and the sting of chilliness coming from Allen's metal tag.

"Moyashi, the reason why you're doing this, wanting to strangle me……need I say this?" Kanda turned himself around, facing Allen, whose eyes were wet and tears kept falling from them. The white haired boy's teeth were bearing and clenched but his face was not one of anger, but one of suppressed agony. Kanda's smirk changed and turned into one of kindness.

"Truth hurts, doesn't it?" At that, Allen's knees buckled and he wrapped his arms around himself. Kanda held him as he fell. The only sound that was heard was the cheers from below. "Listen to them; they are having such a great time. What about you? You're killing yourself over something that cannot be obtained. Isn't it unfair?" Kanda whispered into the trembling boy's ear.

Kanda then lifted the razor from before up, at Allen's eye level. Allen stared at it blankly. The blade shone and a strange feeling beckoning him to hold the knife. However, he made no movement to touch the knife. His eyes remained calm as Kanda brought the knife nearer to his cheek; it paused a few millimeters from the skin. Allen blinked at Kanda who was watching him thoughtfully before he pressed the knife forward.

"Let me cut you free."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Lavi stepped into the house, feeling horribly guilty for being back passed midnight. Though he promised to be with Allen tonight, the team of young athletes decided to prank him by dragging him to a good luck party where all the cheerleaders were waiting to jump him. It took forever to get out of the room and he almost believed that he had gone deaf due to the screaming until he heard a car zoomed pass.

A punch of horrible guilt whammed him in the chest hard when he saw his supposed dinner was placed on the table, neatly wrapped with transparent plastic foil to keep flies from landing on it. Lavi immediately dropped whatever he was holding and ran about to find Allen. He tripped and stumbled a bit. He first checked Allen's room. His eyes widened in panic when there was no one there.

He then turned himself towards his room but then stopped at mid step. His teeth grinded together hard, there was no way the younger was there. The younger would never step in there. It would be a sad reminder of what Lavi was after all.

"_Allen," Lavi started when he came out of the bathroom to see the white hair boy standing before his bed, ripped up bed sheets clenched tightly in his hands as he trembled, as if he was afraid of something. His grayish blue eyes shone with fear and disgust._

"_So dirty."_

"Allen, Allen," Lavi gasped as panic slowly took over his entire being when the boy was nowhere in the house. "You can't have left, right? You promised me, didn't you? Please be here. Please!" Lavi trembled as he did another round of checking. Did the boy finally have enough? Was this night the last straw?

"No, no, no, no," Lavi muttered out miserably as he stood in the middle of the living room. Something caught his sight. Something that was not supposed to be in this room, no, in this house, it was the cheerleader's who stayed over the other time. That girl's mini coat was on the side of the couch. It can only be seen at a certain angle or else it would be passed unnoticed.

Lavi touched the coat. He slowly brought it up to his face and examined it for a while. He then dropped it, as he turned away, the coat fell to the ground, in shreds and pieces before finally landing on the floor in a small mess. Lavi then felt a presence behind him. It was such a sudden feeling that it was as if the person materialized him or herself there.

He turned around quickly, just in time to see the white haired male that he was looking so frantically looking at the torn up torn up coat before slowly bending down and picking it up, slowly examining it.

"Allen……" Lavi whispered in relief as Allen gathered the pieces of clothes together and placed them to a side. The younger then turned back to Lavi, and slowly smiled a little.

"Welcome back, dinner's on the table." Allen said quietly as he stood up. As if knowing what Lavi was about to do, Allen stood still and closed his eyes as he felt the red haired male throw himself at him and they tumbled onto the couch. Allen slowly opened his eyes and looked up at the ceiling pass the messy red hair. He allowed Lavi to hug him tighter.

"What's wrong is something the matter?" Allen whispered comfortingly as he felt wetness on his shoulder and soft sobs shaking the taller male. Allen raised his hands up and stroked his head. "There, there. It's alright. Everything's alright, right?" Allen sighed in relief when he felt Lavi nodding and burrowing his head deeper into Allen's shoulder.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"You hurt yourself today?" Allen blinked at Lavi when the other raised his hand to touch his neck area, which was bandaged around. Allen closed his eyes and shook his head gently.

"It's nothing." Lavi's eyebrows furrowed as Allen dismissed him and went to gather the information and records of Lavi's last assignment together. Never had Allen dismissed his queries, he would always give a reason for the injuries he had gotten, no mater how small or how stupid they were. Lavi pursed his lips tightly before he straightened up when Allen had finally gathered together everything and arranged them in order.

"This is all of Cecilia Lockinstein's part of the Wisteria Crush Incident. Who knew a girl like her could hack into so many computers and databases to cause so many companies to shut down?" Allen muttered in disbelief, to think that the teenagers nowadays would do anything for clothes, parties and makeup.

"Not as bad as the third Economic downturn, cost just by one of the heads' seven year old son. Amazing what you can do with computers and kids these days." Lavi shook his head as he did the last review on the records before he finally closed them all in a suit case. Lavi looked up at Allen with a satisfied smile. Well, actually, it was more of a relieved smile. He was just about to say something before he suddenly yawned, making him sound like he had just croaked at Allen. Allen chuckled lightly.

"Go to sleep. It's already three in the morning. That leaves us four more hours till we have to get up. We'll pass the stuff up tomorrow as well, okay?" Allen murmured gently as he settled the suitcase next to his bed. They were currently in Allen's room. For reasons Allen don't know, Lavi wanted to do his final arrangements in the Exceptionist's room. Allen turned towards Lavi, expecting him to stand up and to retire to his own room but blinked when the red haired Bookman didn't do the expected, instead, looked at Allen with a very lost expression. "Lavi?"

"I'm so sorry, Allen. I'm so sorry." Lavi whispered as he moved forward on his knees on Allen's bed, hands reaching out for the smaller male as if he was far out of reach. Allen's worry took over him as he moved closer to Lavi in a rushed manner and held Lavi. Lavi couldn't take it. He wanted to be with Allen, spend time with him and love him even more. But why, when Allen was staying in the same house as him, did he seem like he was drifting to somewhere Lavi would never be able to see him?

"For what, silly? There, there." Allen comforted as he patted Lavi's back. Lavi held on to Allen tighter at the gesture. Just hours ago, the house seemed so foreign and scary when he couldn't find Allen at all, he had nearly died from a mental breakdown. If one day, the house were ever to be like that again, for a longer period of time, Lavi bit his lower lip and burrowed his head into the younger male's shoulder.

_If one day, you really leave me……_

Allen settled the both of them onto his bed after turning off the lights. Grayish blue eyes didn't leave the scared emerald green ones as Allen slipped into the covers and kissed Lavi's forehead gently. Lavi's eyes clutched shut as the memories of desperation earlier came flooding back to him. He sighed softly when he felt Allen's arms around him.

_Will I be able to live on?_

……………………………………………………………………………………………

Kanda looked out of his window as the moonlight shone onto him and another person who was sharing the same bed as him. He had just stopped patting her to sleep. It was hard to get the other to sleep, as she was always afraid of the dark. Kanda sighed at the time displayed on the electronic alarm clock by the bedside.

Two hours more till he had to get ready for school. He wondered whether he should call in sick from school. He didn't see the point of going to a place to study when he would most likely just doze off due to his lack of sleep.

He sighed again as he shook his head and opened his eyes again, taking in the scenery of the room. His eyes softened a little as a certain memory came into his mind that happened not so long ago. When he was feeling that he was at his breaking point, and he was with another, who was in the same position as him.

His hand slowly raised and touched his lips gently. The lips that touched his at the time were dried and rough, due to the condition the other was in. The feeling of the roughness of a deformed hand on him gave him the shivers at first before he got used to it. The broken gray blue eyes that looked back at him, as if the person was broken beyond repair.

"Moyashi," Kanda whispered unconsciously to the moon as the hand on his lips reached out as if the touch the glowing orb in the midnight sky. "Are you still crying now? Happy about the gift I gave you?"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Allen sat in the bathtub. The water was already icy cold and his body was shivering from the water's temperature. He looked up to see the time on the clock. Two more hours till he had to go wake Lavi up, he thought before he went back to looking at his reflection in the water.

Allen slowly touched his neck, now exposed with no bandage to cover up. A lotus flower shaped motif styled wound on his Adam apple. He fingered the wound, feeling the sting a little as he continued to look at his reflection.

"Hey, don't you think it's pretty? It was given by someone as cold as you." Allen whispered in a sing song manner at his reflection. Suddenly, a smile broke out on his face, as if he had just received the best present ever. "Isn't it pretty?" Allen asked cheerfully, his finger twirled and dug into the flesh, a trail of blood rolling down from the wound.

_The boy's reflection grinned back happily, as the blood covered him from Allen._

"_Beautifully suits you."_

……………………………………………………………………………………………

Lavi opened his eyes slowly, adjusting to the sunlight that shone in his eyes. He hissed a little and rubbed his eyes before he sat up. He could hear the shower water on from Allen's bathroom, confirming the boy was still in the house. Lavi smiled a little before turning his head towards the suitcase. Finally, the records can be submitted and maybe, if they're lucky, moved to a different location, where there were no screamers that will kill Lavi's already suffering ears.

Lavi smacked himself awake before he rushed to get himself changed. Finally. FINALLY!!!!! The one year long screaming and woman swarming would finally be over. For some reason, Lavi felt he could hear angels singing as he quickly rushed down with Allen's and his bags. The feeling of getting the job done, though the process seriously sucked, was the best feeling Lavi could ever experience. After all, it did mean more time with his Precious.

Allen blinked at the flash of red hair that rushed past him to the living room to dump their bags on the couch and rushed over to the kitchen counter, placing his head in his hands, elbows resting on the counter and grinning like a kid who was going to the amusement park. Allen blinked again.

"Morning, Flash." Allen mused as he placed pancakes onto two plastic plates and gave it to the Bookman, whose eyes sparkled as Allen poured syrup, lots of it, onto his pancakes. "May I asked what's with the changed of mood from yesterday?"

"Well, it's," Lavi paused as he took a look at the kitchen clock. "Three more hours till I hand in my records to the Council. And that means, I can finally, _oh sweet heavens yes_, finally, have quality time with you!!!" Lavi grinned so widely that Allen swore he could have been a distant relative to the Cheshire Cat.

"As much as I am hoping the time past faster, Lavi, refrain yourself from sounding like you're having sex when we're eating." Allen said with a stuck out tongue, rewarded with another Cheshire cat grin. No, Allen's eyes narrowed. _It was a smirk._

_Oh boy._

"_Orrrrhhhh_, these pancakes…….._hmmmmm_…..the syrup……_oh sweet records_…..." Lavi groaned and moaned as he munched and licked his breakfast with a mischievous wink. Allen's head slammed onto the counter hard, erupting howls of laughter from the Bookman who then ate his meal normally. "It's _great_."

"I hate you." Allen mocked frown at Lavi before stuffing his pancakes into his mouth, masking his embarrassment. "Thank god you're pretty."

"And good in bed?" Lavi teased, pointing a fork that had a piece of pancake coated thickly in syrup at Allen. Allen made a movement to bite it but Lavi beat him to it by stuffing it quickly into his own mouth. "Ah……_heaven on earth_……"

"Well, as soon as you get off on the pancakes, washed them. No girls, your job." Allen muttered at the Bookman as he placed his plate in the sink. He grinned in satisfaction when Lavi's eyes bulged out of their sockets at his words. "Yes, dear, I'm serious."

"_Mou_~" Lavi whined as he munched solemnly on his pancakes, Allen could just add two big floppy rabbit ears on top of this man's head.

"_Oh yeah_~" Allen whined back, making Lavi choke on his coffee. "Yeah, I learn this stuff too." Allen smirked back at the coughing red haired male. Payback was just too sweet to pass up. "Hurry up, I'll wait for you."

Lavi blinked. It has been a while since Allen waited for him. And with a chance do so; no way was he going to pass it!! Allen flinched when Lavi suddenly started to gobble down his food. Actually, it seemed more like he inhaled his food. He washed the dishes so quickly, Allen was glad, no, extremely relieved, that he had not taken out the China. Allen also couldn't help but winced a little at the squeaking sounds of the plates before they were wiped dried and hurriedly place on the racks. Lavi then rushed over, out of breath as if he had just run a marathon before he straightened up with a huge grin.

"Done!!" Lavi exclaimed before he took his bag along with Allen's and watched Allen blink in astonishment.

"Either the house is going to explode soon or you just entered a Superhero contest." Allen mumbled as he took his bag from Lavi's hand. "Then again, you could enter the Cheshire Cat grinning contest or even the Joker Contest."

"What can I say? I'm multi-talented." Lavi winked before both males chuckled. Allen then stepped closer to Lavi. Lavi lifted his hand and touched Allen's cheek. "It's been a while." Lavi whispered as he placed a kiss on the star like scar on Allen's forehead.

"Hmmm, yeah, I have to stop you there." Allen pushed Lavi away a little, earning a pout out of the taller male. "Well, we have only fifteen minutes till first period start. Let's not ruin this going to be great day with detention. We're also Student Council's members after all."

"But, we might not be anymore after today." Lavi tried to change Allen's mind as he held Allen's body closer to his. He had forgotten how soft and huggable Allen was. "And detention could help us get a room."

"With a teacher in it." Allen added. Lavi's pout got bigger.

"Mood spoiler." Lavi groaned as he opened the door for both of them. Allen smirked back as he walked out of the door.

"Yeah. Thank god I'm pretty."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Lunch break. Lunch Break." Lavi murmured in a sing song tone as he wrote down the history notes from the slides on the screen. Well, it wasn't out of the ordinary. Sitting on hard chairs and copying notes for two hours, minds do wonder during those times. And for Lavi, that would be his freedom.

"What are you so happy about?" Lavi turned and grinned at a moody looking Kanda. Dark circles under the Asian's eyes and annoyed look made him look like something that just came out of Hell.

"Lunch Break in five minutes. Lunch Break, lunch break." Lavi sang as he tapped his watch with the tip of his pen. Kanda groaned quietly as he halted Lavi's hand from making another tap. The tap was making his tired and annoyed mind want to explode. It was just his luck that he was sitting with Mr. Sunshine.

"Please. Understand that I am using please here, don't make a noise, sound or anything that I can hear during these few minutes." Kanda requested as he settled his head on his other hand. He should have stayed in bed like he had wanted to. But remembering that his assignment was due today, he had no choice but to drag his feet across the house to get ready. He had nearly gotten his hair burnt when he knocked off while making himself breakfast.

"Fine, this is after all my last favor to you." Lavi resigned as he stared emptily at the screen. Kanda turned his head at that.

"What?"

"Well, it seems that if all goes well, I'll be leaving this school by the end of the week. And seeing that I only have class with you on this day of the week, it makes it our last day together. Are you going to miss me?" Lavi teased while Kanda looked at him in shock.

Just then, the bell rang. The classroom went while and the students started to rush out o the classroom, without even paying attention to the poor teacher who was trying to tell them what was going to happen for the next lesson.

"Well, that's my queue. Hope to see you around in future, Yuu." Lavi said hurried as he threw his notes into his bag, gave Kanda a little salute and rushed out of the room. Kanda sat at his seat for a little longer. He then slowly reached into his pocket and pulled out a metal tag with a knife marking in it. His eyes narrowed down onto the words written on the tag.

_Allen W._

"Are we always fated to meet and leave?" Kanda murmured solemnly before he stood up and walked out of the room, going to hand up his assignment before skipping the entire day of school.

_Just like last time……_

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"These are the records." Lavi said cheerfully as he passed his superior the suitcase. The superior was a tall person, or was he, as he didn't seem to have feet. In fact, he looked like a floating piece of red robe with shining green eyes. Allen had always felt intimated by this presence. It gave him shivers that ran down his spine.

But for someone so intimating, he always chose the weirdest places to meet. Such as now, they were cramped up in a small cubicle in the teacher's restroom. It would have been so much better if he had chosen somewhere safer. Home would be nice.

"Excellent as always." The robe commented as the papers floated from the now opened suitcase and made circles around it. "As expected of the next heir."

"Why, thanks." Lavi smiled as he hugged Allen. "So when can we move?"

"Aaahh. Well, actually, you might still have to stay in this area, though no longer as a student."

"Say what?" Allen looked up concern at Lavi, whose gripped on him tightened a little and was starting to hurt him. The look on Lavi's face was one of frustration. Allen patted Lavi's hand to comfort him which helped, seeing that the grip loosened up a little.

"There is a family in this area that has been holding a lot of secrets. It's like a poisonous flower. It looks beautiful but will kill if you try or are close to it. We would like you to do records on this family till the time comes and we stop you."

"Family?" Lavi questioned as he rested his head on Allen's shoulder. "So what will I be, if not a student?"

"Aaah, I believe a representative that would be coming here soon would tell you." The robe said. Both boys blinked before they heard the teacher's restroom main door open and footsteps echoed in the room. A knock was heard on their cubicle, which the robe opened.

Lavi's eyes widened while Allen's breath hitched. The robe floated towards the representative's side, who was holding onto some documents. The representative's eyes widened a millimeter but narrowed his eyes in a second.

"I believed you know him as Kanda Yuu?"

Author's Note: I'm going back to school soon, which might mean another 3 months MIA but who said I will leave you guys. To work my butt of the stories will but one of the To Do list and I'll make sure that MIA-ing wouldn't be as long as 3 months anymore. Give me strength.

Read and Review!


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